Right In Front of You
by Cheeseburger of Doom
Summary: Ishida can't see what's right in front of him.


A/N: Happy birthday, Ishida! You have the same birthday as my sister! (is that the only reason I remembered? ;;) Anyway, I gift you with…true boy love! XDXD

Ishida definitely wasn't the emotional type; he preferred to leave that kind of thing to girls, and liked to believe that he was just an average, typical guy.

Sometimes, it was hard to deny certain things; sometimes, he realized that he did indeed have emotions, whether he wanted them or not; sometimes, he had revelations that he probably would have been better of not having.

There was a fine line between hero-worship and love; Ishida thought he might have crossed it. One day, out of the blue during practice, he thought -- what was he going to do when Tachibana wasn't the buchou anymore?

He was sure that everyone had that thought, and he was pretty sure that they all felt pretty empty when they thought it -- but did it go as deep? Did they feel as lost as he did? He didn't think so, because -- well, just because.

Sometimes, Ishida wished he'd never met Tachibana; he could have gone on pretending forever, if he hadn't.

Ishida had a big mouth; sometimes thoughts came out of his mouth before he even knew that he was thinking them; sometimes he said things that he wished he could take back. Most of the time he was too proud to even try to take them back; most of the time, he just pretended that he'd never said them --

Sometimes it was hard to pretend that, though, especially while he was blushing uncomfortably, and he was surrounded by awkward silence.

"I didn't really mean it like that --" he said, trying to cover his tracks, but the damage had already been done. Damn him and his big mouth; damn him and that damn lonely feeling he got when he thought about how Tachibana would be leaving them soon -- he was a good buchou and all, but it shouldn't feel quite like that --

Tachibana didn't even look all that uncomfortable, only a little. That made Ishida feel a little better, at least Tachibana didn't hate him now, but -- part of him had been hoping for a different reaction altogether, even though he wished those words had never left his lips.

"Damn it," Ishida said. What else could he say, at this point?

"I'm sorry," Tachibana said. "I wish I felt that way, but I don't."

Well, there was his answer in black and white; like a knife to the gut, but a knife he'd been expecting. That didn't make it bleed any less, but maybe he'd get over it eventually -

"Yeah, I know," Ishida said, and he shoved his hands in his pockets and walked away -- and he knew that Tachibana wouldn't avoid him or anything, but it was just going to be so weird from now on --

Until Tachibana left; then it wouldn't be anything at all.

It was funny where comfort came from sometimes, though; it was funny that even though Ishida had a big mouth and liked to hide his emotions under his "tough guy" front, and liked to tease people and joke around far too much -- he still had good friends that he could have turned to, had he realized how much they really cared in the first place.

"I heard," Sakurai said. He looked as uncomfortable as Ishida had felt earlier, and Ishida sympathized.

"Heard what?"

"You talking to Tachibana-san." Sakurai stuffed his own hands into his own pockets, and Ishida wondered if he was being mocked, or if Sakurai had something to say that was difficult for him --

"I knew it," Sakurai said, "I saw it. I'm sorry."

Everyone was sorry; but sorry for what? Ishida didn't understand people, sometimes. Well, he didn't understand anybody most of the time --

"Sorry about what?"

"Just sorry, okay? I'm sorry that you're upset right now." Sakurai looked completely miserable; he was the type who liked to hide behind his tough exterior, just like Ishida. They had a lot in common, and Ishida had always known that -- he just hadn't bothered to really think about it.

He hadn't bothered to think about Sakurai at all before now, really -- but when he thought about it, it made a lot of sense.

Maybe if he thought about it long enough, things would change; he could forget the person that made him feel lonely, and fall for the person who wanted to comfort him, instead.

"I'm sorry too," Ishida said, and he hoped that Sakurai understood; if the half-grin on his face was any indication, then yes, he did understand -- and maybe things would be okay, after all.


End file.
